REASONS I NEED COFFEE:
- It tastes like hopes and dreams.
- Caffeine perks me up.
- Other people talk to me in the morning.
- Jail is a real thing,
- It’s difficult to work if eyes are closed.
- It helps me mimic socially acceptable behavior.
- Strangers stare if you forget to put pants on.
You know this list is much longer! What are your reasons?